Yo mama so fat that
- when she goes to a game, she takes the entire ground to sit and the match gets cancelled
- when someone tried to strangle her, she only complained of a sprained ankle
- she drives around in a trailer truck instead of a car
- when they take an xray of her, the rays do not reach the film
- her clothes are made by a parachute manufacturer
- when she donated blood, they sent it to a grease factory because it was pure cholesterol
- when she stands in an election, she crushes the opposition
- when she wanted to weigh herself, the weighing machine collapsed … just in fright
- when aliens tried to kidnap her, their spaceship crashed in Roswell, New Mexico
- when she says 'Hi', the Statue of Liberty waves to her*
- she goes to the zoo, they lead her to an enclosure marked HIPPOPOTAMUS
- (in India) she has her own PIN CODE but they still can't fit it in six digits
- (in USA) she has her own ZIP CODE but they still can't fit it in five digits
- her personal assistant is known as the district collector
- surrounding districts complain she is encroaching on their territory
- when she gets into the elevator, the doors can't close. If the doors close, the steel cable breaks.
- her weight is measured in gross tonnage
- when she took a blood test, they sent it to a marine laboratory. Her blood looked like blubber.
- she has a vote in every state in the Union
- 99% of scientists she is the leading cause of woman-made Climate Change
- Christopher Columbus saw her through the telescope before he spotted America
- when she wants to dry her clothes, she places them over the Sahara desert
- when she wants to take a selfie, she grabs a satellite from space
- she is older than planet Earth. Her distant cousins are known as Neptune, Uranus and Pluto.
- the only energy she can consume is from the Sun. In the evening, the sun becomes exhausted and goes dark.
- she used to have asteroids for breakfast. Now, there are none scattered near Earth's orbit.
- even the cannibals won't eat her. Doctor told them to avoid fatty foods.
- when she joined MySpace, they shut down
- when she joined Twitter, servers got overloaded and Elon Musk changed the name to X
- Youtube and Facebook deplatformed her before she could join
- she bought a tablet because smartphones were too small
- Sumo wrestlers worship her
- when she goes on vacation, she hangs out with Alaska and Hawaii
- tornadoes stop and take a diversion if she comes their way
* — Not sure if this is original. The rest of the jokes are all original and were written in one sitting.